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Metabolic Syndrome: The New Fat

January 5, 2008 Health

You’ve got to hand it to the Japanese.  They have the lowest murder rate in the world, the lowest number of alcoholics in any non-Muslim nation, and the least numer of heavy-set people.  That said, there sure are a lot of unexplained deaths, heavy drinkers and people suffering from metabolic syndrome.

WTF is ‘metabolic syndrome’, you ask?  From what I can tell, it’s Japan’s way of saying “your unhealthy lifestyle is okay, and your stomach is big because you have a disease.”

Excuse me while I roll my eyes with dramatic flair.

Japan is a nation of beer drinking, meat eating men and women who are about as active as any average city-dwelling citizen in Canada or the United States.  That is to say, they’re not very active anymore.  From what I’ve witnessed in my time here, shopping seems to be the biggest workout a person can get.  Walking all the way from the car to the mall … Walking through the stores … Carrying all the stuff you bought ….  Heck, it sounds like a chore more than something people would actually want to do on their only day off each week.

That said, it comes as no surprise that as we get past the big Four-Oh in life we start to develop a little bit of a tummy.  But for many Japanese, this is no biologically normal slow-down of our metabolism.  No.  This is something far more sinister in nature:  a disease called Metabolic Syndrome.  Luckily, no sooner was this terrible disease discovered that pharmaceutical companies had some ‘medicine’ to help prevent our bodies from bulging at the waist.

Excuse me, but I need to roll my eyes again.

Suffice to say, the market for medicines that claim to prevent metabolic syndrome is growing quite fast and the scheduled introduction of a new medical checkup system for this disease is believed to be one factor driving the sales of such products.

Starting from April of 2008, corporate health insurance associations and municipal governments will be required to conduct a special medical checkup for people between 40 and 74 to identify those suffering from this syndrome.  According to the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare, about 57-million people will be subject to the tests and about one-third are expected to show signs of the syndrome.

I wonder if doctors will just look at someone’s waistline and say “Congratulations!  You’re not fat!”

Seriously.  The amount of money being spent on supposed prevention medications in this country is absolutely stupid.  According to Rohoto Pharmaceutical, herbal medicine has seen sales of over 3-billion Yen in 2007.  Among these medicines is something called Bofutsushosan, which promises to reduce fat around our abdomen.

So far, the health ministry has approved some 210 herbal medicines to combat various “ailments”, and it’s pretty easy for companies to develop and win approval for whatever new mixture of roots and flower petals they concoct.  Often the wait time is less than two years.

Kinda makes one wonder if there’s any way an ordinary person can get in on the action.

Not to be outdone by the pharmaceutical companies, electronic manufacturers have started developing health appliances that offer services that combine the measurement of health data with medical services.  Companies like Hitachi, who has developed a system under which customers will be able to measure how much they move and how many calories they burn.  This data is then transmitted to a portable terminal and can be sent to a doctor, allowing them to judge just how fat and lazy a patient might be.

Other companies, like Matsushita Electric, are developing small machines like the Joba, which went on sale back in 2000.  The Joba has sold over 300,000 units so far and people burn calories by balancing on the device while it gyrates.  This little horseback machine is considered to be a forerunner in the field of anti-metabolic syndrome appliances and is currently in its fifth generation.

What I find most comical about this whole ‘metabolic syndrome’ scheme is that people actually think they can remain skinny and in good physical shape while doing no actual labour.  Back in the day, people would do a little exercise to lose some weight.  It’s sad to think that people are now being brainwashed by pharmaceuticals to believe that every freakin’ thing that causes our bodies to deviate from what we see in TV advertisements is some disease, condition or syndrome.  There is nothing wrong with realizing that we’re getting older and putting on the pounds.  If a person really isn’t happy about it, perhaps they could take up jogging or going to the gym for a few hours a week.  These shortcuts to the “perfect body” will only make things worse in the long run.

That said, there’s definately some money in it for those of us with a little ambition.  I’m off now to buy and stock a vending machine with some of this herbal medicine stuff.  If there’s really a few billion Yen to be made, then I want in on the action.

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